Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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