I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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