Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
