On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
