let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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