We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Randomize
