some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
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