Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
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