Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
