you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Never let your siblings swipe right.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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