you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
