I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize