i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
