Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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