I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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