do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
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