Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
17 year olds will be the death of me.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize