If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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