everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Randomize