Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
pray to the hookup gods
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
