Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
