that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
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