The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
