He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
