You're so nebulous sometimes
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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