planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
