Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
