; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
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