it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Randomize
