Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
