how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
