is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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