i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
