i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
