Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
