apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Randomize
