Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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