walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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