he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
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