If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Randomize
