Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize
