And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize