sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
