marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
