im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
