Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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