I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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