1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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