There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Alive.
So much puke
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
