Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize
