you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
