Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
