We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
